Monday, September 19, 2016

Women Stereotypical.. Really??

A wallflower,  a doormat.  One who doesn't have a voice, no freedom no life! If, this is  our first impression about 'her'; it is not she but us who need an education.

Good morning Toastmaster of the day, fellow Toastmasters and guests. I a modest woman of the 21st century pose to you a grave question.  Are all women stereotypical? Some of you may agree, some disagree. Further down the line maybe you'll debate on their ethnicity. Asians may say middle-eastern are oppressed. The middle-eastern might pity the western women who are free and yet bound by clutches. While the west may have a similar opinion on the Asian counterpart. All lost! Every change in the vicious cycle of categorising women, sometimes by women themselves . But hey, have you ever bothered knowing what's beneath. Beneath the skin irrespective of colour, caste, religion and creed. There's a heart just like yours that beats.

Indian woman. What comes to your mind when you think of an Indian woman. A god fearing, head bowed down to respect men obedient and homebound, waiting to be freed of the age old philosophy. Or an uneducated village girl or a modern girl from city who idolises the western society. To each his own. Unless you are totally ignorant or a foreigner,  your impression of Indian women solely relies on the media. What the media shows is not always the complete picture. True,  villages are the heart of India but not every village woman is uneducated or backward. If that were the case there would have been no woman teachers or sarpanch. What the media shows is a twisted image of the condition of women sometimes for some political agenda other times simply for the sake of gaining sympathy and viewership.

On a more global and personal level, there are two imageries that are the most common ones; picture a muslim woman and the accompanying image comes with a burqa or an hijab that's the headscarf. And if the lady in question doesn't wear none then lightly put, she's more than likely to hear wow! You're a different liberal woman. Hello my dears!!! Is the outer covering or the lack of the only thing that describes me as a woman? She is covering herself she must be a religious conservative, shy and a victim of male domination.  Poor soul doesn't even get a chance to voice her opinion. Oh my God isn't that harsh? Isn't that again stereotyping? How do we know she's all those things? Did we find it out first hand or like everyone else our first impression was made with the media image? Not everything is as it seems, true 10 % may fall under this convention but what about the rest? Take time to think before you reach a conclusion.

Another recent example of this can be the condition of certain women in the European countries. Let's take France for example, I'm sure everyone hears the news. The latest burkini ban! Duh what is that? It's just a term coined using burqa and a bikini, a beach wear designed for hijab and burqa clad ladies. India approves it, after all burkini beats bikini here any day. Alas! Peace is always short lived, there is always some or the other ban taking place somewhere in the world. Ban the hijab, ban the burkini, ban woman from voting yes yes it's the Vatican City, ban woman leaving home at night and ban the bikini too. Oh no no,  the last one is okay, it's nothing to worry about. But in the 50s even woman donning bikini's were stereotyped as loose morals and banned by the church. Are they truly?

Why 50s even now when women wear short dresses or something that is not 'society' approved there is an uproar. So miss X was raped,  it's her fault why was she flaunting herself to him and travelling alone at night, women are supposed to be in bed by 9. Or she had completely hidden herself in her veil,  I'm a hot blooded man obviously I was curious,  it is all her mistake. So much for woman liberation and equality where people judge us on the way we dress!

Stop double speaking,  stop judging woman by what you see what you hear. Next time you see another woman, whatever her colour or attire be. Stop that brain of yours from wondering about how she is, you might be wrong. There's a saying 'Don't judge a book by its cover',  so 'Stop judging and start embracing.'


Note: Speech is made out of facts and figures researched from the Internet. (Topic required a little research)


-Fatima

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Phantasm




Icy winds sailing through

Seeping into
my very bones,

Cut open,
my soul

Howling now they pass
From me towards you.

....

Afloat you lay,
Drenching in the frosty rain

Tearing like the red sea,
Feeling the raw pain

Spurting water
Gasping for air,

Bleak eyes gazing with solace.

...

Shivering
Teeth clenched

I wake up from the daze,
Chilling the rolling fears

Wrapped in a soothing caress
The fog slowly drifts away

Awaiting warmth
I lie with you in December days.

-Fatima

Thursday, August 6, 2015

One Step At a Time

Dear Student,

"To be a part of a child's life and celebrate his every little success forms the greatest moments of any teacher's life."

There are days, more like moments when you are downright confused, messy and in a haze of a crazy spiral mess. The more you share the more varied views or advice you receive. And if, you are not completely sane and in one of those moods it affects you the most, dampening your mood and spoiling your day. It's not just you whose affected but the people you hang out with; your colleagues and if you're a teacher the worst hit party are your students. They bear the brunt of your mood swings. But is it right or is it mental? It would be unwise to say, you're correct and blame your students for everything, "Hey I was stressed out and you added to it" or "It's all your fault, kids these days I tell you no respect for elders or teachers." et al. I mean it's easy to jot down excuses and blame others, why do we not look at our faults? It could have been us and not them.

From the past one week or so, I've been listening to this; "You're too friendly or you care too much. It's okay to care for your friends and family. But there is a line between a student and a teacher. You shouldn't be friendly with them, at least not outside the class and blah blah." End of story what all that yielded was;
1. Not to be friendly to students.
2. Only be strict.
3. Do Not Care, there's a line that divides you.

I freaked up, big time. On one hand I've had some exceptionally awesome teachers, who went on caring for us like we were their own kids. And the best part was, they loved us; loved me, were friendly & caring, heard us out even if they couldn't help us and always, always gave us advice; not the bookish one but of their own experiences. And I realize we respected them, still do and even remember them, are in touch with them, if not all some. They taught well, maybe they weren't perfectionist, no one is or maybe they were. But they respected us, us students. And looking back now, I don't remember how they taught me or if, they ever made a goof-up in class, what I do clearly remember is, how they made me feel. Heck, they didn't even lose hope in me when I and my so-called friends thought I was a lost cause. After all, all we need is a bit of love, hope & lots of faith.

And today I finally took the courage to ask my mum, "Hey what kind of a teacher were you?" And you know what she told me? "I was friendly, caring; I was new obviously so it was not a cake walk everyone is at one point but I maintained good relations both in and out of class. Experience and perfection in teaching comes with time, when delivering a lecture. But friendliness it should be there from the start. And what you need to have is patience, lots of patience."

This reminds me I read somewhere, "It doesn't matter if your student is 5 years younger to you or 15, he or she is your student & if you treat them well, they will treat you well, and respect you." After all to gain respect & friends one should be the same. You get what you give.

There will be hundred's of people who will advice you, but only ten will truly do and mean it. So today, my confusion has resolved and I'm sorry for being mean and selfish and for being angry when there was no need, anger is never the solution. I love you guys and that's it. I've loved every single student of mine that I've taught till date and In shaa Allah will do in future too.

And an ending quote, "The best thing about being a teacher is that as they grow, we grow with them."

-love, Fatima


P.S: The opening and closing quotes of this letter are from, Make A Difference page couldn't help but share.


Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Solitary Solitude


















Walking through the woods
I sometimes feel so alone
A void engulfs and the air stills
With none but just the sound of my boots.

Trodding the barren road
I cross a shallow stream
Submerging grief and kindling dreams
Listening to the sloshing sound of my bare feet.

Strolling a bit further down
I reach the end of the narrow trailing route
Pondering, the silence slowly flows
Hearkening to the whooshing hush of my sitting knees.

Reaching the cold rock lastly
Towards the untouched horizon, I see
Watching the sky mesh in shades and hues
As I lay down to rest awaiting a day anew.

-Fatima

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Betwixt


Dark night with cool air
And there she lies with void bare..

Lonely and muddled as midnight moon
She shies away in the starry gloom..

What is it that numbs the pain
She searches the antidote now blase.. 

Spring summer autumn and snow
She welcomes them all, all the same..

Longing hoping for moments unknown 
She wishes for warmth in the passing rains..


-Fatima