Symphony of the silent night !

A continuation from this series...Moments(Post #5)

Symphony of the silent night !

(Post # 6)

 

It was a cool night after a scorching day, she was sitting by the sea face on the concrete pavement eyeing the vast expanse of sea before her. The full moon was in shades of dull light yellow and playing hide and seek with the dark black clouds that adorned the starry sky, the weather was pleasant after the city was hit by showers an hour or so back... She sat there hugging her knees resting her chin on them. She seemed to be tranquil on the front but was feeling a mess inside, the silent winds sent shrills down her spine resurrecting the buried pain and emotions and a tear trickled from the corner of her eye making its way down her cherry cheeks clouding her eyes, yet she sat unmoved lost in her own reverie.

Sitting on a lone bench,

Eyeing the splendid sea...

The gushing sound of waves,

Brings back some memories to me !

The ardour of rains,

And the calmness of breeze,

Makes me want to believe...

You too care for me !

On days when I fear,

I wish you were there to hold me...

But all I can do is...

Hold back my tears still loving thee.

Neither can I deny,

Nor can I accept,

Yet at times like these...

My heart wishes you too loved me !

Breaking from her trance she realized they were just like the shore and the sea; neither can they be together nor apart but at some point they do meet and at times, wait is the only hope you have. Thinking so she let out a sigh and gathered herself, she was a strong girl and she had to be one for them...she could just not loose hope and cry...maybe love was not meant to be but friendship forever! Saying so to herself she walked home with a smile though her eyes had a different tale to tell.

-Fatima 

P.S: Image courtesy google

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MOMENTS

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 20; the twentieth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

MOMENTS 

(This is actually the Post #5...a continuation from this series Post #4)

"As the rain drops caress my soul, let them caress yours too,

Let your guards down and enjoy the heavenly pleasure

of soaking in contentment and glee,

Gathering happy memories with you and giving way to more,

Letting your mistakes and past flow and purify you to the core,

Enjoy this wonderful weather...

With a smile and joy in your eyes like I do !"

        The December rains always leave me in a trance, heavy rainfall accompanied by snowfall later mesmerizes me as the weather is considerably below and beautiful and that adds to the unending expanse of scenic beauty as romance is in the air.

        Unlike other days, today I'm sitting by the window pane and enjoying the pleasant and exotic beauty of nature contemplating how there was a time when I freely twirled and swirled in the rains and soaked my soul and was the most boisterous girl in the locality, but now I just admire and enjoy the beauty silently just like a demure soul. It is not that I'm a shy person or that melancholy has hit me oft recently it's just I'm observing and looking at life through a different angle. I'm not ignorant but an observant, "Joys and sorrows are a part and parcel of life, one sleeps whilst the other is awake!"  I learnt this from him I learnt a lot from him. He showed me the true meaning of love, concern and friendship. When people sympathized with me, he was empathetic to me. He was like the light in darkness and penetrated my abode with ease when others found it crooky. And though we may be apart, we are very much together.

"Twirling and swirling in the rain,

Drenching my soul,

A lone tear escapes...
I wonder and let out a sigh."

         Somewhere, same time he was walking through crooked lanes and narrow roads and enjoying the ethereal beauty of nature, he was not much of a person who admired nature but since the advent of her in his life he gained joy even in the smallest of things. Children danced and giggled in the rains, vendors sold their stuff each and everything was peaceful amidst the chaos. He felt like a free bird, raring and exuberant exploring the world and a thousand Watt smile lingered on his face remembering the words, "Hey, Mayank you walking with an umbrella in these rains? I know its an absurd question to ask but God you seriously don't know how to savor such a beautiful moment!" Tamanna's words rang loudly in his mind.

        With that he folded his umbrella and was contented covering the further journey soaking himself completely. He imagined Tamanna dancing in the rains and urging him to join her; the one girl who taught him to enjoy small moments of life despite the fact being a little depressed herself at times. She was really an enigma to him, and there she called him a mystery waiting to unfold. A lone tear escaped his eyes just remembering those beautiful moments!  

P.S: The girl described earlier in the first para is Tamanna.

-Fatima

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Credits

Image - Window Rain Drops by Eric Alder
Courtesy - www.deviantart.com via www.blogaton.in

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Post #4

Its just a random conversation....a part of this series  Post #3

Post #4 

It was a warm evening after a hot and hectic day, they took a stroll down the winding road trying to figure out things between themselves, trying to talk but as usual none took the initiative and were silently walking, when she suddenly broke the silence....

You know at times you feel you had someone in your life to lean on maybe emotional support, to love and to cherish but then other times I feel this all is too clichéd and you just can't expect these things...they are just like an illusion.  

He thought for a while before replying, Some people do get it, don’t they?? Apart from that fact despite the many differences there is one thing that’s common between us…

And what could that be, she retorted back almost instantly?

He was again dumbfounded at the intensity with which she was taking things forward gazing towards the sky he spoke in a neutral tone, No matter how much we carve for love…no matter how much we carve for that rare illusion, but the storm raging within ourselves never seems to cease and we continue to shower our feelings to the people we love and at times it crosses it limits and if we didn’t have anything in common do you think today you and me would have been here together?

This time round she took time to process all that he had said, Hmm…yes there is a bit similarity but yet the gap between us is too much as in the emotional and egoistic bridge. You can be too egoistic and I more on the emotional front and to bridge this gap you should be too compromising and I should give more space then necessary but then is it possible as none is ready to sacrifice after all one is calculative while the other is deceptive though  having our own sets of inhibitions!


He smiled genuinely taking her hand in his and continued walking in silence after all, silence is what they best understood in each other.

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-Fatima

Hope you can connect to it...Do give your valuable views :)

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POST #3

I dunno if this post is interesting or not but it is very necessary as this is an attempt to describe his persona.....Continued from here Post #2 

Hope you accept it !!! Will wait for your comments as always :) 

POST #3

Oh! How so I wish to embrace you in my arms,
Rest my head on your shoulder and forget all the norms;

And let out all the tears I've suppressed for so long.

        The day has ended and the moon is up, the sky is pitch black and the stars adorn and lit  it beautifully adding to the unending expanse of the ethereal beauty and the darkness that engulfs. I'm sitting by the window seating unlike other days when I'm on my study table buried into my books; nocturnal is what she calls me as I too bask in the moonlight like her and find solace in the never ending night, we are strangely similar yet dissimilar.

       I being a studious and realistic guy to the core whose only passion is studying and scoring good grades and looking at life through the lens wherein she is an epitome of an idealist and saw herself as a free bird when the reality was stark opposite.

       The November night was silent yet there is a nerve soothing melody in it that relaxes me and urges me to open the blind folds of my heart and peel a layer off myself. I being a loner most of the time prefer to dwell in solitude as it gives me a sense of tranquility, well my fellow class mates have a very different picture of me 'lonely'  is what they feel I am; they have misinterpreted but I don't feel the need to correct them; my mother is the only one who truly knows me. Life at most times has not been easy it's still not as even the basic needs are hard to avail and there are days when basic necessities are lacking as mom is the only working member of the family. Not all know this fact but my dad is bed ridden due to paralysis, I don't like to let this out openly as then people pity us; hospital expenses, medicines and even my studies leave her in a lurch yet she doesn't utter a single word and continues slogging hard for us, somewhere down the line I know this is the very reason I've lost my innocence and embraced maturity, as I've to toil my way through the hardships and you have no one to open up too and comfort you. But life changes and so do people in your life; there was a time when only my mom knew my emotional state and now she too is there, the one who has carved a special place in my heart and is there with me to comfort me and to talk to about life and it's unruly ways, when responsibilities fall on your young shoulders and at times you feel like breaking down and escaping the clutches of this crippled life that has rendered you helpless, at one point of time I did feel so.

        I stare into the black sky and look to the lord above as I'm tired of questioning destiny and God too; feel like I've reached the saturation point from where I can't help my mom nor reduce  her woes and ease her financially nor can I emotionally complete my dad. I've stopped asking Why me? nor do I say Try me! as life has tried me more than once; a near to death accident of my younger brother right in front of my eyes, dad suffering from heart stroke and being paralyzed, financial crises so much so that I even contemplated giving up my studies to support my family; had it not been mom's strong resistance and will power I would have crumpled to life's unruly demands long back yet I recoiled in my shell and became a loner and a melancholic soul. It was then that she walked in my life and awakened the long lost emotions which were seemingly dead, though it was just the arrogance and rudeness that took birth first as she tried to intrude into my personal space but slowly with the passage of time it turned into a beautiful friendship and now I call her 'my soul searched' friend. It now feels that my hope is no longer forlorn and it has re-awakened and goodwill is all around, mirth is taking birth in my gloomy home and life once again as mom too has started smiling and dad too is active though still bed ridden. Slowly things are seeming to change and sorrow is fading and joy is replacing and it's all due to her presence; she is truly 'Light in the Darkness.' 

Life take me the way you want,
And lead me to a place where no one has ever been,
Hills and Plains I'm ready to cross,
With you by my side, I can forever trod.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hope you liked it, honest reviews are most welcome :)

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POST #2

        Disclaimer: 

                     This again is just a random post based on an incident but more like a series which will have continuity. Hope you like it ! You can go back to this as it is a part of this series too... Post #1

   POST #2

 

              

         It had been an early rise, the colour of monsoon added to the vibrant nature, yet another day of rainfall. The cool breeze swayed deliriously and the trees swirled and animals hid in their niche as the sun was busy relaxing itself behind the layers of clouds! Finally, after an hour or so, the sun slowly crawled out of it's niche and the soft, warm rays penetrated my abode with utmost ease. The birds were now chirping and the fresh flowers bloomed welcoming a new day, a new start. It was a lovely day and I sank deeper into my blanket and snuggled inside it, unlike my younger sister who stood by the window and basked in the early sunlight. I however, didn't seem to find peace in the morning like most people do, I love the night and darkness as it provides me tranquility and comfort that I want, it is far more bright, warm and cozy in comparison to the broad daylight.

         
          I hid myself deep within the blanket until darkness completely engulfed me, sleep had left long ago, though I did feel sluggish. My mind wandered and I pondered slipping into my own world, contemplating and reflecting the past and the memories. Ah! and I realize the past has washed itself with the rains and purified me; but the remnants still remained though very vague. Exams are round the corner yet, I do not study. I'm not avoiding it deliberately but I'm unable to give my heart and soul to it, although I'm no topper not even close to being a topper but an average student, still something didn't seem quite right but what? I still am unable to find the reason for the sudden chaos that has engulfed me and my concentration too is dwindling since a past few days. It is such a freaking thing that you are busy figuring out the crap math sums wherein you can't even figure out the math of your life! Ain't it true? Yes, it is indeed but then it has always been me who searches answers or is in the quest of unraveling things and also the one who has to bear the brunt and scoldings from my dad as all the praises are reserved for my younger sister; the one who is very disciplined and never lies. Well that is one outlook that no matter how much I try to change I'm unable too.

          It is not that I'm jealous of her, in fact I'm very proud of her and she is my biggest support and my strength, who loves me more than any one could possibly do apart from my mother who is no more, though she was not my real mother she loved me more than anything in this world, I don't even know who my real mother was; my dad never spoke of her nor do I intend on finding about her, for this lady alone was my mother and will always be. It does pain and hurt and my heart cries when dad accuses me of every wrong committed and leaves me all alone. They say I've chosen this path myself, is it? I've been used to hear words like, 'chatterbox' ,'whimsical' and an 'emotionless person' not only from dad but from my aunt and some friends too. They encouraged her and she excelled too, but what about me? "Oh! Tamanna, no she is good for nothing and a madcap!". These words ringed loudly in my mind as if they were just said yesterday but then they were uttered long ago. It's true, Time heals all wounds but the memories never leave your side; they are etched in my mind and so I've simply recoiled in my shell and present a facade to this world. Speak what they wish to hear and listen only that should be heard. I guess hardly anyone apart from him knows that I have a flair for writing stories and poems; that I'm an intellectual person too whose true potential is not tapped and that I love silence and also that I'm a trapped soul, trapped in my own past who fears opening up for the fear of losing.

          A sudden wave of emotions hits me and the words rush out, I grab my diary that is kept on the bedside table and pen down,

Would you tell me if you're jaded or waxed ?

Or rather you prefer calling me unique and whimsical ?

Ideas and notions, is that the reason ?

Build a shell around me and started believing in fairies;

Oh! dear child

Wake up, Wake up to the gory reality that hides;

Smiles and frowns are a part of life !

Link to Next Part: 

-Fatima

Chronicles of an Escapist! #1

I've been acting a bit weird lately, just my other self you see. Whenever something happens I try to analyze it and delve deeper into it, something not new but what is new is I try to draw conclusions; at times I'm unable to and I'm left in a lurch other times I do reach to some answers.
Guess I'm home now-a-days due to the upcoming exams and all I do is just study and that's when boredom hits me. I'm not the one who can sit for hours doing the same thing be it studies or some other chore, I'm always on the run in the quest to do one thing after the other.
In childhood it was labeled as multitasking and extraordinary whilst now its mere restlessness and lack of concentration ! I'm amused at how fast perceptions change.

I wish to add more things under it, lets see what happens ! It could be anything; a vignette, a one shot, a random conversation or a free random verse...simply anything that comes to my mind.

Hope you enjoy it and do lemme know ! 

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POST #1

   

    The view was pristine and idyllic, they were sitting by the edge of the porch silently watching the sudden downpour. The sky was grayish and it was getting dark with each passing second. The wind was blowing harshly and leaves were scattered all around; the roses in the garden were withered and only small shrubs and violets that were close to the ground were safe from natures wrath. The calmness that prevailed was now lost and diffused into nothingness and it seemed as if the tempest would take over. The aura of innocence was overshadowed by that of vile and things no longer seemed to be austere.

         The clouds roared again and she quivered and let out a shriek, trying to process the thoughts and indications but she again failed to draw conclusions. It was something she loved right from the childhood, talking to nature, questioning it and trying to understand and unravel it as she felt it hid some very basic answers of her very existence; with the passage of time and responsibilities this interaction had reduced but never diminished.

         He sat beside her unlike her, he was calm and collected as he tried to gauge her state of mind; her face was an array of so many emotions and feelings yet they were quite  obscure for him to make out the true meaning of them. Dead silence lingered for a while, the downpour had relented and only slight sound could be heard, it had been some 30 minutes that nature was retracing back to its calm and serene self; the wind was now softer and cold compared to what it had been. He spoke out of the blue, Do you not think calmness always quells chaos? Though it seems all prosaic yet it gives birth to a hope unknown that fills the heart with mirth, curbs enmity and raises amity. There was a sudden lull in the conversation and it seemed insipid yet he did not know how to formulate his thoughts into words and let her know. She didn't revert back for quite a time, she was eyeing the sky that was now a darker shade of black and it remained intact; she was not much into thinking at the moment and was basking in the aftermath of calmness and rains.

         She spoke after long, It would be improper to say only calmness quells chaos; it could be the other way round too, can't it? As order comes after chaos and solitude is all what is needed to clear the mess and to tread ahead. It doesn't give birth to hope as hope is always there, it is just the revival and rebirth of it. Chaos at times is good as  you walk the untrodden road, see the gory reality and at times multiple faces of the same individual; it is good to know so much is hidden and you fail to notice it in the first glance yet you still in believe in fairies and hope is alive. It is this hope which may seem as small as a pea but it shakes mountains and flips the world upside down; It is just an allusion and it entices you and then you forgo and move ahead. It is all a part of the illusory world, a condition of mind, you see only that which you wish too and life is just a part of it. She felt it was quaint yet unsure if she could continue; she stopped midway to glance into his eyes, there was a gleaming smile in them and it reflected back in hers.

        And then all faded and diffused into the oblivion as they reverted back home.

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-Fatima 

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