Mon Amie

We are so foolish, so utterly naive that when someone is good to us, we feel they are the sunshine after rain. Red, orange, green, blue like the colours of the rainbow. And no; no talking about lovers and crushes or someone you're simply attracted to. This is someone you think of as a friend. It is important to be a friend before anything else.

Leap of faith, liking someone and expecting them to reciprocate; that's love. But what about friendship? Do we expect there or cease expectations the moment we befriend. What about wanting to be surprised by an unselfish gesture is it too much to ask, from a very close friend? It's all a twisted labyrinth of strewn hopes and dwindling emotions.  All you wished for was a moment of companionship, sometimes it's too much to ask and other-times it's all you need.

-Fatima

Image Source: http://favim.com/image/419029/

Regret

remember the strings?

walk one step coming back two..

sigh, to time gone by

-Fatima

Colloquy in Cold

Prelude to this

It was nearing eventide, the quaint cafe at the end of the cobblestone road was nearly vacated. A band of youngsters were crooning to some soft acoustic music filling the café with mellow notes.

She was sitting across him nestling a cup of warm black coffee in the confines of her mitten covered palms. Winters, coffee, conversations and them, they were the only things that remained unchanged in a sea of time, careers and friendships. The only ones they looked forward to every year.  One thing led to another, and laughter breezed through them.

"I suspect highly that sharing our feelings make us raw to being vulnerable. It’s better to not share because sometimes, some things are best locked in the crevices of our hearts and minds. You know it is not good when someone knows us to the point of vulnerability. It’s like they can exploit you and you can’t even put a stop to it," Ayah swift-ed the chat.

Having known each other for the past eight years he was not at all surprised by the sudden change in conversation. Yasin nibbled the last of his biscuit before reciprocating back to her.

"Sometimes you let people know you, and you do that to fight your own loneliness. Some might say, I prefer my solitude but aren't they the same people whose face lights up in the company of others. Aren't they susceptible to vulnerability? The smile that brightens their moment gives away more than words ever can. You know you aren't really vulnerable until you let yourself be."

"I wish I could hug you, but we both know how afraid I am. Afraid to trust someone all over again," she responded softly continuing to gaze outside seeing the rain loudly lashing the window pane.    

-Fatima

Part II

Bruised For Life

The wind had an eerie calm yet it was captivatingly charming, as she left the dingy motel. She hated every waking minute of her life doing the unworthy work but unfortunately having no other choice she crumpled. The wind blew more sharply making her drape her flimsy shawl more tightly to her chest as she trudged through the thin veil of night. There was nothing in sight apart from the lone moon as her companion as she walked for miles. Finally stopping at a bare fountain, she let out a frigid breath. She longed to sit down and gather little strength but she couldn’t think of sparing any minute. She had to reach the cottage near the outskirts of the town before midnight. It was a night of great importance and she couldn’t afford to be late today. After all it was his birthday, her son’s first birthday. Her only savior, in this ruthless world.      

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Ebb and Flow

Millions of emotions stir,

Some in my mind,

Some in my heart…

Some die and some live...

But once again,

The sun goes down across the sea,

Waking and weaving thousand dreams in my being!

-Fatima

Fading

Sometimes you defy your own destiny,

Sometimes you alone are responsible for the woes in your life..

Sometimes you love so much that it becomes suffocation,

Sometimes your truth becomes your lie..

Sometimes you break friendships with your own hands..

Sometimes you be honest and the honesty backfires,

Sometimes you want to cry and not a tear falls..

Sometimes you stab and betray when all you wanted was not too..
Sometimes you know it was love but it comes across as something else...
Sometimes you  are only the cause of your shattered self,

Sometimes you deserve...deserve to be alone and isolated..

Coz sometimes you snatch your own hope and break the one you love...

-Fatima

Drama Queen's Isle

 

Drama Queen's Isle

 

Having Sunday Morning Blues (SMB), instead of lazing around in my bed and enjoying this awesome weather..I'm studying for my exam tomorrow..unfair highly unfair...hmmp MMB's (Monday Morning Blues :D) are better than SMB...

This has gotta be ridiculous utterly ridiculous, I've got an exam my mini project exam coming up tomorrow and here I am once again randomly scribbling on my blog...not that this is the first time I'm doing this right before my exams. But I recollect now as I type this post that something similar was done last semester and practically before every exam, seems like a stress buster :D

Hell, seems like I've finally become insane, writing what ever is coming to my mind and all but what can I do, if all I feel like is to brew a hot cuppa of black coffee and sip it slowly and watch the downpour from my bedroom windows...yes it's raining since yesterday and I still haven't got a chance to play in rains :D mum's strict orders you see till tomorrow and I can't even fight back.. :( Nor can snuggle in my blanket with good daydreams or a novel which is none other than Catcher in the Rye that's pending since a long time...

Never mind that, one can always have hopes that that day will come soon when they are free from the cruel tyranny... of studies though the liberty lasts only for a mere couple of days..yet the exhilarating feeling you get can't be confined to words! Mine off-course starts from tomorrow and still I'm whining and being all melodramatic..

Alright now enough of my chatter I really need to go back to studying so I can talk fluently in front of the teachers and earn good points instead of...better not think of anything negative at the moment!

Ciao till we meet again!!! :D

-Fatima

Woo Hoo... ;)

Woo Hoo… ;)

Alright posting this post seriously means I've lost it and I've gone crazy...I mean its ridiculous the way I am acting but its hardly that I act normal you see...always lost in a world of my own and blah blah...

But today has to be the wackiest days of all...why you may ask or you may not...you might even think what has happened to her all of a sudden or how come she's fooling around and what not will squirm in your mind though I hopefully hope it doesn't...doh! again drifted away in my chatter...

So, where was I ?? o_O Yep got it..me and my craziness...now enough of all this let me get straight to the point..or things that I've done that I usually don't do...I prefer systematic stuff so lets go in point format :D

1)  This pic was uploaded on the great FB by a friend of mine and my first reaction was......

"zoom zoom....flying in air wroom wroom :D that too on flying brooms ..woo hoo :P" 

...and here people found that pic mesmerizing..I tell you my humor has gone outta the window today.. :-/

  

2) The whole nation is lost in kolaveri di after all it's so awesome and fun loving lite song and I too fell in love with it..but then 9xm came with Bheegi Billi version of it...here it goes,

"Why is Bheegi Billi bheegi billi just like this"

and today instead of kolaveri I was humming that..seriously...this is the limit but no today toh I couldn't see the speed breaker only !

3) And last but not the least I changed the template of my blog out of the blue...and coincidentally its blue in color...lol Hope you liked it :P 

Well I won't bore you guys more seriously I'm not joking... :D so I come to an end of this weirdo post by me...Hope you at least smiled if, not a laugh I know I suck at humor... :D 

-Fatima 

Chronicles of an Escapist! #1

I've been acting a bit weird lately, just my other self you see. Whenever something happens I try to analyze it and delve deeper into it, something not new but what is new is I try to draw conclusions; at times I'm unable to and I'm left in a lurch other times I do reach to some answers.
Guess I'm home now-a-days due to the upcoming exams and all I do is just study and that's when boredom hits me. I'm not the one who can sit for hours doing the same thing be it studies or some other chore, I'm always on the run in the quest to do one thing after the other.
In childhood it was labeled as multitasking and extraordinary whilst now its mere restlessness and lack of concentration ! I'm amused at how fast perceptions change.

I wish to add more things under it, lets see what happens ! It could be anything; a vignette, a one shot, a random conversation or a free random verse...simply anything that comes to my mind.

Hope you enjoy it and do lemme know ! 

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POST #1

   

    The view was pristine and idyllic, they were sitting by the edge of the porch silently watching the sudden downpour. The sky was grayish and it was getting dark with each passing second. The wind was blowing harshly and leaves were scattered all around; the roses in the garden were withered and only small shrubs and violets that were close to the ground were safe from natures wrath. The calmness that prevailed was now lost and diffused into nothingness and it seemed as if the tempest would take over. The aura of innocence was overshadowed by that of vile and things no longer seemed to be austere.

         The clouds roared again and she quivered and let out a shriek, trying to process the thoughts and indications but she again failed to draw conclusions. It was something she loved right from the childhood, talking to nature, questioning it and trying to understand and unravel it as she felt it hid some very basic answers of her very existence; with the passage of time and responsibilities this interaction had reduced but never diminished.

         He sat beside her unlike her, he was calm and collected as he tried to gauge her state of mind; her face was an array of so many emotions and feelings yet they were quite  obscure for him to make out the true meaning of them. Dead silence lingered for a while, the downpour had relented and only slight sound could be heard, it had been some 30 minutes that nature was retracing back to its calm and serene self; the wind was now softer and cold compared to what it had been. He spoke out of the blue, Do you not think calmness always quells chaos? Though it seems all prosaic yet it gives birth to a hope unknown that fills the heart with mirth, curbs enmity and raises amity. There was a sudden lull in the conversation and it seemed insipid yet he did not know how to formulate his thoughts into words and let her know. She didn't revert back for quite a time, she was eyeing the sky that was now a darker shade of black and it remained intact; she was not much into thinking at the moment and was basking in the aftermath of calmness and rains.

         She spoke after long, It would be improper to say only calmness quells chaos; it could be the other way round too, can't it? As order comes after chaos and solitude is all what is needed to clear the mess and to tread ahead. It doesn't give birth to hope as hope is always there, it is just the revival and rebirth of it. Chaos at times is good as  you walk the untrodden road, see the gory reality and at times multiple faces of the same individual; it is good to know so much is hidden and you fail to notice it in the first glance yet you still in believe in fairies and hope is alive. It is this hope which may seem as small as a pea but it shakes mountains and flips the world upside down; It is just an allusion and it entices you and then you forgo and move ahead. It is all a part of the illusory world, a condition of mind, you see only that which you wish too and life is just a part of it. She felt it was quaint yet unsure if she could continue; she stopped midway to glance into his eyes, there was a gleaming smile in them and it reflected back in hers.

        And then all faded and diffused into the oblivion as they reverted back home.

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-Fatima 

Next

        
         

A random verse....

Would you tell me if your jaded or waxed ?

Or rather you prefer calling me unique and whimsical ?

Ideas and notions, is that the reason ?

Build a shell around me and started believing in fairies;

Oh! dear child

Wake up, Wake up to the gory reality that hides;

Smiles and frowns are a part of life !